Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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