pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
i already hear my dad disowning me
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
