We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
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