Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
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