Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
We have so much sex to catch up on
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
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