if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
Randomize
