i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Randomize