sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Randomize
