we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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