I just saw a hot homeless man
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
found the other keg... it's in the tree
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
Randomize
