Nicole vs. Life
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
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