Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
Randomize