hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
Randomize
