his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
