ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
Randomize
