i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
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