I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize