That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
