I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
... I threw up in the shower this morning
You were "I'm not drunk" drunk.
I was feeling sad so bedroom vodka seemed like the best solution at the time.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
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