dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
Randomize
