i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
Randomize
