i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
Randomize
