did you hook up austin?
No! he threw up in my bathroom, made me wake up and order him jimmy johns, beat my roommate with a macaroni and cheese box, and then passed out with her in her bed
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
Randomize
