brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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