im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
Hey cutie is the game almost over? I'm making dinner for us it'll be ready soon. Xox
You would rather make fucking dinner than watch a hockey game that rivals the epic-ness of miracle, the one of the biggest upsets in sport history? Babe I don't know if I can date a girl with such terrible priorities.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
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