So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
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