I have demons in me.
I just cut my nipple shaving
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
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