i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
Santa Claus winked at me two tables over at the Chinese place tonight I was almost afraid he knew "getting laid" was my Christmas wish
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
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