Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Randomize
