oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
I showed him my bush... on skype.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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