Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize
