when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
it was like having sex with a tree stump
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Randomize
