i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
Randomize