Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
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