If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize
