Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
he high fived his dick after we had sex
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