i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
Randomize
