Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
your like the ambassador to my penis.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Randomize
