You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
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