they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
Edward fifth and chaser hands
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
Randomize
