You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Jon just got arrested by the quesadilla police
What?!?
What I actually meant, is I had a quesadilla, and Jon got arrested by the real police
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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