Is it because I queefed?
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
Randomize