seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
Randomize
