Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize
