pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
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