we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
I intend to get homeless drunk
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Randomize
