she was so not down for the gang bang
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
Randomize