You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Randomize
