If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
Randomize
