There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
Randomize
