Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
Randomize
