she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Randomize
